David Cameron – Your 5 Year Appraisal

Dear Mr Cameron,

On the eve of the election I thought I’d write to you, say hello, and let you know how I think you have performed in the last 5 years.

I’m sure you’ll be delighted to hear what I think.

You say ‘Stick to the plan’

Well very simply Mr Cameron, why should we? You didn’t.

You will not be getting my vote, and here are the reasons why.

You stood in front of a hospital 5 years ago and said words to the effect of ‘vote for me and this hospital won’t be shut’. You got elected and closed it.

You said you would challenge air pollution which is at absolutely lethal levels in the capital, and you haven’t changed it. This while house prices continue to rise, with a propped up, inflated, false economy. In essence this means people in London are paying a premium so they can have a shorter and lesser quality of life.

This neatly gets me onto diesel engines. Anyone with a brain can easily see a diesel powered car is more harmful to breathe in than petrol. So what did the government do? They ignored the advice from experts, they lowered the price of diesel, got everyone buying diesel cars and after steadily increasing the price of diesel now everyone is hooked, the government has done a kind of U turn and realised diesel is bad. Tax bands will be reformed and the motorist will suffer yet again.

This leads me neatly onto councils who will introduce additional charges for diesel powered cars.

Councils in this country do what they like. The government allows them to set their own ‘laws’ on all manner of things. This leads to disparity and in essence allows them to be a rule to themselves. Parking charges, appeal process, rates, etc, everything the government should be involved with or assist set you have just let them do for themselves. It is why some councils fair much better than others and why so many councils lost millions in the Icelandic bank crash a few years ago, even though they are not supposedly allowed to have ‘savings’.

You said you would safeguard public workers and pensions, you haven’t.

You said you would tackle immigration, you haven’t.

You said you would raise the threshold for inheritance tax, you haven’t. Why on earth should people who have worked hard and contributed to this country while alive be penalised in death? Why? All those piers and ‘non doms’ the government allows to get away with so much, and all those companies that wriggle out of paying tax, and yet ‘the working people of this country’ are held accountable again.

The systems in this country are not working. They are being abused by the few and at detriment to the many.

You have taken easy decisions in my view. It has been easy pickings to go after those who can’t do anything about it. You should have challenged the big players, but you didn’t.

And you can blame the coalition whenever you can; say they have stood in the way of things you wanted to achieve. I don’t buy that either. You have the majority, you are the Prime Minister of this country, you should just get it done.

So Mr Cameron, this is why I think it doesn’t matter how much you run about around the country exhausting yourself trying to get votes. I’m sure many agree with me that it is rather superfluous.

You will not be getting my vote, your term of office will hopefully come to an end, and here at the Equilibrium Party, we wish you all the best in your future endeavours.

Best of luck

Mark Scotchford © 06/05/2015

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Taking a chance
Going out on a limb
Saying goodbye
New life to begin

14 years
In the same place
I will wait
For the fall from grace

Herded like sheep
Every day on repeat
Those who know no better
Fall at their feet

All the power
Means nothing in the end
When you leave
Call someone a friend

Let’s stay in touch
Meet again soon
We must catch up
In the empty room

So what now?
Where do we go from here?
Have no idea
That’s abundantly clear

Think outside the box
Whatever that should mean
Never revisit
Where already have been

Wanting a challenge
Something that stretches the mind
Won’t be conventional
Difficult to find

Won’t be easy
Skills difficult to assess
As for qualifications
Don’t care less

So with these words
Let them demonstrate
A dance with the devil
A brush with fate

Mark Scotchford © 28/04/2015

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Curling into me
Felt your breath on my skin
There isn’t a battle
Don’t need to win

Arms wrapped around me
Just for a while
An elegant walk
An inviting smile

Smart and sophisticated
Alluring smell
Close your eyes
Cast a spell

Forget what I’m not
See what we are
Look into me
Not the clothes or the car

I could be falling
Hold on tight
Lay down your arms
We shouldn’t fight

Mark Scotchford © 21/04/2015

Just found this. I wrote it years ago.

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What is rubbish?
What is waste?
Time spent creating
With less haste

One man’s rubbish
Is another’s treasure
Somethings in life
We just can’t measure

Wanting the new
The old cast aside
Surface and skin deep
It’s what is inside

Be very careful
What we agree matters
Promises broken
Trust in tatters

Take a second look
What is lost for gain
Forgotten in landfill
What will remain?

Mark Scotchford © 02/04/2015

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The Start of Chapter 1 – Weightless

Litelli felt the tingles of his senses come to life as he emerged from sleep into consciousness. Before his eyes opened he could feel the material of his clothes against his body, feel the coldness of the air he breathed and he could feel the grip of something around his right foot. As his senses feedback to his brain what was going on he could also feel the the weight of his head and upper body. It was a strange sensation and one he couldn’t fathom. It just didn’t feel right.

As his senses levelled out he opened his eyes. A few inches away from his face, dashes of white and grey marble seemed to flicker with the afternoon sun against them. He could feel the cold winter air against him and his body. He realised his legs felt colder. His arms, too.

Aluminium strips about 3 inches in diameter ensconced the marble as it travelled the length of his current field of vision. He looked up as if to see how far the marble and metal would dominate his view.

It just went on and on, and then…….there were…….people. Little people?

The reality of the situation sunk in, a sick stirring of fear started to engulf Litelli’s body. He was upside down, and the marble a few inches from his face, was part of a building he was dangling off of, but what was holding him?

Instinctively but wrongly he started to kick with his feet and move his arms, bringing them towards his body. His arms moved OK, and his left leg, but the right leg still had resistance. In these tender seconds he realised the grip of something round his leg was the only thing stopping him from plummeting towards the cars and people beneath.

He stopped kicking. And now realising for the moment, up meant down and down meant up, he looked towards his feet, towards the feeling of weight against his leg.

‘Where is it Litelli?’ The voice raged. ‘Where the f**k is it?’

‘Where is what? I have no idea what you are talking about’ said Litelli with a chilling insight into what this could mean.
‘I know you have it. And I know what you did to get it. So don’t you dare play these games with me. Do you not remember me? Do you not know where you are? Do you forget what I am capable of?

Litelli’s predicament had frozen him in time for a few moments. He began to think of how he didn’t scream when he first opened his eyes, of how he didn’t know where he was, what city, what building he was hanging of off, let alone what country. All this really was quite superfluous he thought. It really didn’t and shouldn’t matter. Quite obviously his main focus should be answering this mans questions and being pulled up from the side of this building.

Litelli began to focus on the questions and the voice asking them. As he hung upside down he looked to where the voice was coming from. It wasn’t from where he was being held. The voice was from a couple of feet away. He was fairly sure. So he wasn’t alone? Whoever had him.

Litelli composed himself once more. ‘I honestly have no idea what you are talking about. I don’t know you. I haven’t lost my mind and I know this isn’t a dream. I remember my name and who I am. I don’t recognise your voice. Maybe if I saw your face. I would know who you are and what you are talking about?’

Litelli hoped this more heartfelt and more lengthy reply would give some credibility to his unspoken plea of being hauled up from where he was. Surely he was telling the truth?

As he became more aware of the gripped right foot that was the only thing suspending him, he now realised it wasn’t a hand but something mechanical holding him. Almost a vice like grip.

Ordinarily under normal circumstances this would have felt painful but now, the pain faded as if it wasn’t there, Litelli would be plummeting to earth.

‘You have one last chance’ said the voice.

Litelli heard the rattle of a chain. As the chain took up slack, he heard a grunt from where the voice was coming from, about 8 feet up from where he was hanging. His ankle cracked with the momentum of being wrenched in another direction, Litelli’s lean and toned 12 stone bulk having no option but to follow in pursuit. He expelled an earthy, defiant, angry sound as he felt the pain of the ankle crack, then his face and torso slamming into the cold marble. His arms seemed to flail behind and he had little reaction time or control over them. They too slammed into the marble, hands first, then elbows. He didn’t make a sound. Almost as though he was used to pain now.

He must be held by something mechanical. Maybe ‘the voice’ wasn’t with someone else. Maybe he was alone.

‘You got nothing for me? Nothing?’
‘I can’t tell you what I don’t know. Do you want me to lie?’
‘I actually thought you’d be keen to tell the truth under the circumstances.’
‘What’s your name and what is this thing that I am supposed to have? That might help’
‘Are you taking the p*ss now? You know who I am. And you know what I want’

Litelli thought of his options. Rather limited he reasoned. No escape plan. Except an answer. And would he live even if he did answer? Regardless of whether that was the truth? Would this person really drop him?

‘I can’t help you’ said Litelli.’
‘Well then’ said the voice. ‘You know me. Very well. I’m Greysun. Sometimes called Brazon Greyson, which incidentally I don’t like. Mine is the last voice you will ever hear and I’m a man of my word, as you already know. So let me help you.’

Greysun peered down further over the edge of the building. To see his foe. He let go of the chain. The chain slammed to the floor, seething and wriggling with speed like a hungry mechanical snake zooming in on its prey. As it got to the latch that the partially built window cleaning winch was attached to, it clunked and cracked loudly. The clamp released. Sprang up. That would be it…

Letilli heard the noise above, and for a split second, he tried to reason with himself that the noise had been something else. With no hesitation or favour towards gravity, he began to hurl towards the ground. His arms flailing, his legs kicking. It was a long way down but he knew it would be over with quickly. Soon he would be dead.

As he fell his back cracked and pain shot through his spine as his legs arched over himself. Almost as though his legs were in a race with the rest of his body to get to the ground first.

Insurmountable pain began to surge through his neck and head too. He was picking up speed fast, travelling at great velocity now towards the concrete below. He thought as if falling to his death wasn’t enough; it had to hurt on the way down too? His body was close to flipping over on itself. As he fell, thoughts flashed through his mind, as I guess they would for anyone at this time. Consigned and resigned to death, Letilli thought about his life, his loves, those he had hurt, and those he had lost. He guessed the fall would take no more than 20 seconds. He was a long way up. His eyes were shut, the force of wind too hard to keep them open. Why keep them open? He thought. He knew what was going to happen, why see it coming?

Unable to resist, he forced his eyes open. He saw something below, and not just the ground. Before that something red, squared, and bright. He didn’t know what it was, but he was hurtling towards it.

Greysun stepped back from the edge of the building, the impending death of another man at his hands flitted across his soul, just for a second. He knew the consequences of his actions, and so did Letilli. That’s how he reasoned it. He was almost consoling himself of his own actions.

Of course he had a choice, but so did Letilli. He should have told him what he wanted to know. Then he would have lived. Greysun shook his head as these words drifted through his head. He knows he would have still dropped him, he had to go, he knew too much, had gotten too close. There was no other option.

Now Greysun’s job would be harder, but he would still succeed. He would go to Letilli’s flat, break in, and find what he had hidden there, or look for clues about where he what or who had it, or who knew. Someone else must know.

Greysun held his left hand up to his face. Forced his palm under is stubble jaw, and pushed it hard up the side of his face, grasping his temple. His hands were rough. I guess he did dirty work. He wasn’t a man to wear gloves either. It affected grip and feel, and besides, gloves could still leave traces for forensics. The smell of the rusty metal still lingered on his hands, the metallic smell flaring his nostrils and reminding him of what had just happened, and what he had just done.

Pebbles crunched under his footing as he walked back to the staircase. He knew he didn’t have long to escape before the police arrived. He couldn’t chance taking one of the main lifts. He would walk down the majority of the stairs, which wouldn’t be a problem. Then he will take the tradesman lift straight to the basement car park. He would see how many Police were there, and if too many, would leave the car, and take the footbridge over the lower complex and down to the metropolis beneath. CCTV could be an issue but with the 100’s Sunday shopper sales foot fall, he should be OK.

The building itself shouldn’t be a problem. Still being built, not occupied on any floor. Just the odd security guard to contend with and no cameras live yet. There were a few tradesmen about but not many were working this day. He had done his research, ear wigging in the local pubs, hearing the chatter and natter.

Letilli hurtled towards the red squares beneath. As he got closer he could see what they really were. He thought about whether they would help, whether they really could save his life. In the vital seconds he had left he wandered whether they would make his death worse, even more imminent, they could slice him in two.

He covered his head with his hands, and tried to pull his knees in toward his head, bending his legs as he did so. He managed it.

At close to 90mph, Letilli ripped into the red squared safety netting. At this speed, it could have sliced him in half but not this type. It was of a plastic composite, not like the old rope style and had been there since the beginning of the build. Most of it around the building had been removed, as it was so near completion and this section had remained, due to be removed next week.

Mark Scotchford © 09/02/2015

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Charity Clarity

If you were asked who you most dislike out of the people alive in the world today who would you say?

I guess obvious choices would be heads of regimes and tyrants etc, but you’ll be surprised who I dislike intensely. Bob Geldof.

I think he’s a nasty, vicious, angry man. May I explain? Years ago I remember coming home from school and hearing him shout and swear on national television ‘give us your f***ing money’

Ummmmmmm, no Bob, I don’t think I will actually, and certainly not if you ask me like that. By all means ask me, and nicely, if you have given up all your worldly goods, and you don’t have millions in the bank and numerous houses etc, but don’t ask me when you haven’t, and don’t ask me in this manner because I really don’t like it. Ask my teachers, they will concur.

That was a number of years ago, and he hasn’t changed much. He still looks like he has nowhere to live even though he has, and he still has the aggression, and another worthwhile cause.

‘Do they know it’s Christmas’ was such a patronising song in so many ways. No reason to dwell on that now. I guess it got the job done….

Anyway, the point of this piece is to discuss charity and what it means to us etc. I do think there are some golden rules.

I learnt years ago that if you give someone £5 you don’t have the right to tell them how to spend it. Sounds simple? OK, fine. Do you like cigarettes? Think they are worthwhile for anyone? Give a starving person £5 and see them walk out of a shop with cigarettes instead of food. See what I mean? If the person you give the money too chooses to live for the moment that is there choice, not yours.

Ok, so just give to a charity? Well, uummmm yes, you could do that but most governments are corrupt so very little of the money you give gets to where it needs to and also did you know that charities in this country only need to spend 40% of their donations on their cause? The rest they can put down to marketing etc. Still, those aside charities in the UK are just basically brilliant and so are all the people who work for them.

What are the other options? Well I’m saying it’s probably not good to give someone on the street money, and definitely don’t give to Bob, and some, not all of your money will get lost overseas so, can charity begin at home?

Yes, but don’t give someone money, give them what they need.

It isn’t about what it is you give, it is about the value of it to the person you are giving it to. And this is relative and nothing to do with money.

For example a freezing glass of water is not too welcome on a freezing cold day but a hot drink would be lovely.

Just as in a pair of gloves in the summer is useless but in the cold of winter; they could be very handy indeed.

And also bear in mind, we are odd, so some people won’t actually think to ask for what they actually need. This could be the same for people you are giving presents too this year.

I know that Britain is hated in some parts of the world but I am pretty sure we give more to charity per head of population than pretty much any other western country. Yes, we may be construed as an arrogant bunch but we are generous.

If you talk about giving does it count?

Well, I think it still does yes. Giving is extremely satisfying, and liberating, in an odd kind of way. Helping others, I mean really helping someone, is actually quite a novel concept for me.

And my advice, don’t be detached. Don’t give £20 to a charity over the phone. You can do this too but I would suggest you try another approach. Give your hat or your pair of gloves, or your coffee, or your bacon sandwich to someone instead of walking past them as they shiver peering into a bin.

Talk to them, look them in the eye, and then try not to exude too much emotion as they offer to shake your hand and wish you a Merry Christmas. And if they say no, or ask for a different flavour sandwich, or a red hat not a black one, just be polite but firm back. Ask them do they want it or not? I bet they will say yes.

And always remember, you could be in their position a lot sooner and faster than you think.

Mark Scotchford © 24/12/2014

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Sowing The Seeds

We often hear about planting seeds and sowing ideas in our minds but I have one rather odd question to pose to you. What exactly are seeds?

Well, it is obvious isn’t it? They consist of an outer shell to protect embryonic plant seeds. And that is it, isn’t it?

I don’t think so. What must they be? If Darwin’s theory is correct, what must they be?

Studies have shown that plants actually react and adapt to their environment. Doesn’t this make them intelligent? After all isn’t how quickly someone or something adapts one of the greatest signs of intelligence?

A brilliant piece by PRI interviewing Michael Pollan (shame his surname isn’t pollen) states that when a certain plant was played the sound of a caterpillar munching on leaves the plant re-acted. For years if someone had said that plants are intelligent they would have been sneered at, and perhaps much worse, but now, scientific research is actually backing this up with facts. Michael mentions the book ‘secret life of plants’ from 1979 and it is rather fascinating.

Back then people were encouraged to talk to and play music to their plants and it all got very odd and weird and as he stated the sciences behind the book didn’t really stand up. As a result Michael says, scientist shied away from going into plant research because if they did they would be dismissed as a ‘wacko’.

As is usual I have a theory and I am not sure if it is best to say it or to try and prove it. Obviously the latter is better, and I’d like to know, has it been tried before?

The theory is fine; and just makes me seem odd which I am fine with, it is the trying to prove it could get a little gross and even odder.

Ok, brace yourself; this is the very odd idea. I would like to prove that seeds are in essence, or used to be, dried up brains. Not brains as we know them now to be but a primitive version, millions of years out of date. I think we must at some point wish to disprove or prove that our brains, and animal brains as we know them now can be nurtured. How interesting would that be?

Now, I know, this could all get a little gross. Initially we could start with a dead fish. Extract the brain and basically plant it. Just a pot with some compost and perhaps growth fertiliser. Nothing too extravagant and nothing that could compromise the integrity of the experiment. See what happens. Now if this doesn’t work, (wouldn’t be a surprise would it?) We could try it with a newly caught fish and try extracting the brain and planting it immediately after death. Obviously you would then be obliged to eat the fish and I would also ask that while the dissection is done, we, and by this I mean you, are gentle and treat it as though it was living even though it is in fact dead.

This is because I would like someone to tell me when does a brain actually die? Is it immediately at death? How are we sure? Just because as a whole how we see a living thing in its entirety has changed with death, does that mean all of the brain is dead?

I am guessing the fish would be easy to work on as it is most familiar to a non scientist and easy from an anatomical point of view too. No skull as such and no other heavy bones. If the fish is a no go, then to completely disprove the theory we would have to move onto something from the land.

Now from an evolutionary standpoint this could make sense. In terms of a ‘land brain’ being more adaptable and evolutionary connected with something from land could make the ‘take’ easier.

Again the gross part would be more gross because we would first have to extract a brain from a dead animal, and here I am thinking bird or squirrel and if that didn’t work then perhaps a newly dead bird or squirrel.

The idea of either of these sounds rather disgusting and disturbing to me. I wouldn’t fancy trying it at all and I would feel rather nauseous and crazy. So, who would try it? Will anyone ever?

Oh c’mon, yes, it sounds crackers but I bet some of you talk to your plants?
Imagine the concept – ‘Don’t bury your pet, plant them’

Imagine where this could lead? Surely not……

Mark Scotchford © 29/11/2014

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